Mentoring Men

With special guest:

• Ian Westmoreland
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Mentoring Men like a lot of great things in life started simply, one man and an idea.

Ian Westmoreland decided that what Australian men needed big time was an opportunity to learn from the wisdom and mistakes of other men. But he discovered that the number of such services offered free to adult Australian men was zip, zero, zilch. This is when he had the idea of setting up Mentoring Men. If this meant working full time 7 days a week for no pay then so be it.

There would be very few men who do not at some time experience periods of anxiety, feeling down, relationship issues and low self-esteem. For some men these negative emotions are occasional and for others they may occur more frequently. When it happens, men need someone who will listen to them without judgement.

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Origin Story

With special guest:

• Dr David Christian
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

It doesn’t get any bigger than this!

In his new book Origin Story: A Big History of Everything our guest David Christian traces human history arising from the Big Bang and going through to the first stars, our solar system, life on Earth, dinosaurs, homo sapiens, agriculture, an ice age, empires, fossil fuels, a moon landing and mass globalisation. And all this is done in the context of what it means to us and our families.

This origin story is one of numerous such stories. Examples might include the Christian story of creation and the Aboriginal Dreamtime. Dr Christian’s story is based on the latest scientific findings and theories but it is told in a way that it can be related around a campfire or start discussions around the dinner table. What we hear is that story telling going back to the beginning is important to all of us.

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A Better Death

With special guest:

• Dr Ranjana Srivastava
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Most people in our society try to avoid death and taxes. But at least in the case of our mortality it is a universal experience, a bookend of our life, part of being human.

Our guest today is Dr Ranjana Srivastava OAM who is an Oncologist working in the public hospital sector of Victoria. Ranjana packs into her daily life being a doctor, an award winning author, a journalist and also a family life with her husband and three children.

Yet her professional life as a cancer specialist revolves around dealing with a deadly disease, cancer. It often falls to her to pass on the unimaginable news that the person in front of her has limited time to live. Some doctors can’t imagine themselves doing this because they want to help heal a condition. Other doctors can’t imagine doing anything else and for this they have a special type of courage.

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The Boy Crisis

With special guest:

• Dr Warren Farrell
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

The big issues of today include ISIS on the international stage, gangs of youths in our cities and disengaged sons in our families. Our guest today has found a common link in each of these and that is the preponderance of dad deprivation for both the boys and girls involved.

Dr Farrell has been researching for 11 years in order to produce his latest book and some of his findings are eye opening. For example we discover that the downward spiral of boys in the developed world is leading to physical changes. Young men of today have a sperm count of only 50% what their grandfathers had at the same age and it is dropping by 1.5% every year.

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A Paradigm Shift in Suicide Prevention

With special guest:

• Anthony Smith
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

We ask Anthony Smith what is the situational approach he has written about. The surprising response from Anthony is that only 10% of suicides are due to depression or what are loosely called mental illnesses. This is the first of several surprises in today’s program.

We discover that suicide is the biggest cause of death for Australians between the ages of 15 and 44. We discover that three out of four deaths are males. We find out that the cost to the economy amounts to 4% of GDP. And we are told that the current response by the Health authorities is on the wrong track.

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An Awesome Ride: Through a father’s eyes

With special guest:

• Cameron Miller
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In 2012 Shaun Miller made a YouTube video in his bedroom called MY FINAL GOODBYE. In this video Shaun managed in only 2 minutes and 54 seconds to get out some important messages before it was too late.

Shaun was only 17 years of age but he knew that he had at most a few weeks to live because of his heart condition. He said that he had no regrets and that we should live life to the fullest. We should express our love to the people around us. Importantly he said to make sure that his dad Cameron was OK.

Overnight there were 30,000 hits and a week later that number had gone to over 1 million. Now it is over 7 million. Clearly this is an extraordinary person.

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The Prettiest Horse in the Glue Factory

With special guest:

• Corey White
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Luckily for our guest today he always believed he was special. That belief was severely tested before too long.

Corey White grew up knowing that his father was in jail and his mother was a heroin addict. Both parents disappeared from his early life and his life journey was about to become a roller-coaster with no guarantees.

Corey is never one to sugar coat his experiences. He had to sell himself to totally unsuitable foster parent candidates in the hope they would take him in. Once in a family he was subjected to cruelty, dysfunction and in once case sexual abuse. At school he was bullied, it was all grim and he wasn’t even 10 years old.

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Too Soon, Too Late

With special guests:

• Ralph & Kathy Kelly
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

There is widespread knowledge of the July 2012 attack on 18 year old Thomas Kelly. The sorrow felt by the community was compounded by the loss through suicide of Thomas’s brother Stuart four years later.

Ralph and Kathy Kelly have experienced the unimaginable but as a measure of the innate qualities of them and their family they have, in the time since, made great strides in reducing the dangers on the streets of Sydney.

In their book Too Soon, Too Late Kathy and Ralph tell how they explored what happened on those July days in 2012 and 2016. They talk about the care and assistance they have received from people such as former NSW Premiers Barry O’Farrell and Mike Baird. They also reveal the human side of the people on the front line such as the NSW Police Force Homicide Squad. Within themselves Kathy and Ralph found the bravery missing from anonymous “trolls” who did not like some of the changes to our drinking laws even if they resulted in a dramatic reduction in hospital admissions on a Saturday night.

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Defying the Enemy Within

With special guest:

• Joe Williams
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

When his father presented his South Sydney first grade rugby league jersey to Joe Williams it was a special moment. When Joe went straight into the ranks of professional boxers without any need for an apprenticeship as an amateur it was another special moment. Off the sporting field Joe is an established speaker on the circuit in Australia and the USA. So what could possibly be wrong?

We learn in this fascinating discussion that behind all the achievements Joe was battling serious mental illness from a young age. There were inner voices crowding out his thoughts and trying to drag him down. Joe admits that these voices denied him the satisfaction of reaching his true sporting potential but he is now on a course that he sees as more important.

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Anxious Kids

With special guest:

• Michael Grose
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Michael Grose and his co-author Dr Jodi Richardson are often asked when making parenting presentations if there is an epidemic of anxiety among our young people. If you were asked the same question you might immediately say yes but before he answers that question for us in today’s program, we ask our guest what it is exactly that we are talking about. Is anxiety the same as depression? Is anxiety built into us? When does it become harmful? What can we do about it?

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Dadvice

With special guest:

• Dr Luke Martin

Seriously! Becoming a Dad can be a white-knuckle ride and sometimes it can be overwhelming. When you leave the hospital carrying a new baby it might be the first time it hits you that you have taken on an enormous responsibility and yet you are not issued with an instruction booklet.

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Transgender

With special guest:

• Sarah
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Sometimes through no fault of our own the people closest to us will turn against us. People who do not even know us will take a position about who we are. Sarah, not her real name, was assigned male at birth but always knew something was not quite right. Finally after the trauma of a marriage breakdown Sarah decided to express her true self by confirming her gender.

While she expected this to be a challenge, she was not expecting all of the problems she would then face from her family and the legal system. Join us today so by listening to Sarah we can all learn something about ourselves.

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Dads in Distress

With special guest:

• Pete Nicholls
  … in conversation with Glen Poole

2019 marks twenty years of Dads in Distress (DIDs) activities.

This is a fabulous achievement which deserves widespread recognition in our community. From an idea conceived on a veranda in Coffs Harbour by Founder Tony Miller it is fair to say that thousands of men who felt they were in hopeless situations have been helped.

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Roadies

With special guest:

• Stuart Coupe
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

We have always heard about the sex and drugs of the rock’n’roll lifestyle but few of us get any access to this hidden part of the music industry. Until now

Stuart Coupe has lived in the music world for over forty years and by getting the roadies, these unsung heroes, to open up we can find out both the good and the bad sides of this life on the road.

Stuart tells us one of his motivations in doing the research and writing his latest book Roadies: The Secret History of Australian Rock’n’Roll was to preserve the stories from the early days because the roadies have had some casualties and he does not want the stories to disappear with the last of the original roadies. Not only does the lifestyle take a toll on the roadies’ physical health but the toll on family life is intense. The roadies will often be away from home for 10 to 11 months of the year because the show has to go on.

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International Men’s Day – Kiwi style

With special guests:

• Donald Pettitt
• Iain Fergusson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

New Zealand is known for many things including a world champion rugby team and a young charismatic Prime Minister.

The most recent way the country has distinguished itself is by joining the world wide movement to celebrate their men and boys on International Men’s Day through the initiative of our guests today, Donald Pettitt and Iain Fergusson.

The movement is based in Christchurch, a city that still bears the scars of the massive earthquake in 2011. This major catastrophe has had an impact on the lives of people in the Canterbury region but the strength of the locals has been revealed as the city has emerged again from the ruins. Many have experienced the quiet strength of New Zealand males over this period.

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Vale Quentin Kenihan Superhero

With special guest:

• Quentin Kenihan

Quentin crashes Dads on the Air?

Quentin Kenihan first came to public attention over thirty years ago when he was interviewed by Mike Willesee for national TV. After that came a series of extraordinary experiences, superhero adventures and also trips to the other end of the spectrum when it all seemed very bleak.

At times Quentin battled depression, loneliness, fear, anxiety and pain. But Quentin never let disappointment keep him low for long. Before you knew it he had his zest for life back again and was off chasing another goal from his bucket list that was constantly being updated.

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Life and Death Planning for Country Properties

With special guest:

• Owen Catto
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today is Owen Catto from The Regional Men’s Health Initiative of Western Australia.

Owen’s life as a farmer began when he worked on the family farm for 18 years with a small interest in that farming business given to him by his father. To back up this direct experience of conditions on the farm Owen also has a Bachelor of Business in Agriculture and has operated a farm consultancy business. When talking about life on the land we might say that Owen knows his onions.

This is a particularly important time for our families on the land because in 2018 our farmers are facing an unprecedented drought. Yet the toughest critics of our farmers are the farmers themselves.

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The Prostate Cancer Challenge

With special guest:

• Peter Dornan AM
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest is not squeamish about many things. He opens up to us today about what it is like to face a condition that we still do not like talking about, urinary incontinence. Incontinence affects men and women; it has been described as the most widespread yet least known and understood affliction in society today. This problem can seriously impact on your lifestyle, job, emotional wellbeing, exercise activity and most importantly, your sex life.

Peter Dornan has been a leading Physiotherapist for over fifty years and during that time he has helped patients with all sorts of complaints. Yet twenty years ago he did not know what a prostate was when he was told that he had prostate cancer and if he did not take any action it would kill him.

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Australia Reimagined

With special guest:

• Hugh Mackay AO
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Australia has had a well-documented and unprecedented run of economic growth but this has not translated into a happy, harmonious society. Our guest today is Hugh Mackay who describes the current level of anxiety in Australia as an epidemic.

The level of income inequality in Australia is growing, public education is under-resourced and our children are falling behind when compared to other first world countries.

And at a time when we need them most we are losing faith in our major institutions namely the Church, our elected parliamentarians who are supposed to be acting in the country’s interest, the major banks and even the families who give us security. Right now all of these are under threat. Over half of marriages end in divorce in the first ten years leaving children in the lurch. The two Royal Commissions that have investigated banking and before that institutional abuse of children have revealed some of the worst abuses of power.

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Out of the Forest

With special guest:

• Dr Gregory Smith
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

When asked if he sometimes pinches himself and wonders if all that has gone before is true, Gregory Smith says not sometimes but all the time. Our guest today has a truly amazing story that should encourage all of us.

After a traumatic childhood Gregory was always trying to escape from his surroundings and became something of an escape artist. Except that he did not escape and his efforts just led to painful encounters with the country Police of NSW.

When his mother deceived him and left him at an orphanage in Armidale he spent 19 months experiencing institutional abuse. To make matters worse he was thinking all the time that his sisters were enduring something similar at the same institution after they were separated from him by the nuns on arrival.

Following these experiences Gregory understandably would not trust adults. Having left school at the age of 14 and not being trained in anything useful Gregory found himself homeless, friendless and frequently jobless. It was only when he followed a road that led off the highway near Mullumbimby in northern NSW that he finally found peace in the isolation and tranquillity of a rainforest.

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