Reflective Parenting

With special guest:

• Dr Alistair Cooper

“She has a mind of her own” is something we hear often enough when parents are talking about the challenges they face in trying to relate with their children. Yet if parents accepted this as fact and tried to find out what was going on inside this other mind the world would become a lot less complicated for both parent and child. With co-author Dr Sheila Redfern our guest today Dr Alistair Cooper has written a new book Reflective Parenting: A Guide to Understanding What’s Going on in Your Child’s Mind showing how to read your child’s mind and use this knowledge to improve your relationship. If you follow the principles of reflective parenting in everyday interactions it will help your child achieve her full potential and save your sanity.

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Male Health in Australia - Men’s Health Week 2016

With special guest:

• Dr Gary Misan

The health of Australians in terms of life expectancy is good by world standards.

However when we examine life expectancy it is often forgotten in these times of women demanding greater empowerment that males in Australia die more frequently than females in all age groups. Male life expectancy is 4.6 years less than females and the gap has increased not declined since 1900. In remote and very remote areas average male life expectancy is 4 years lower than in more populated areas. For Aboriginal males the average life expectancy is only 59 years a full 6 years less than for Aboriginal females. Furthermore male health extends beyond the purely biological aspects and encompasses a range of issues affecting the health and wellbeing of men and boys.

Against this background the Government introduced Australia’s first Men’s Health Policy in 2010, some 30 years after the Women’s Health Policy appeared. We ask our guest today Dr Gary Misan what changes have we seen since the 2010 introduction of the Policy and to what extent has it been picked up at the state and regional level.

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Unfinished Business: Women Men Work Family

With special guest:

• Dr Anne-Marie Slaughter

When our guest today Dr Anne-Marie Slaughter wrote an article for The Atlantic magazine in 2012 it created what could be described as a firestorm. The article had an estimated 2.7 million views and sparked intense debate. Someone seen as a leading light in feminism was questioning the feminist narrative.

The article was called “Why women still can’t have it all” but clearly there was some unfinished business and this became the title of her new book Unfinished Business: Women Men Work Family in which she uncovers the missing piece of the puzzle.

Anne-Marie is clearly a gifted communicator as demonstrated in several high-powered careers, most notably her time as Director of Policy

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Planning in the US State Department working alongside Hillary Clinton, the Secretary of State.

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Hunter Valley Men’s Crisis Support

With special guest:

• Philip Penfold

Charity starts at home.

Philip Penfold, our guest today, was born and raised in Maitland NSW. When he spent 18 months in the USA he witnessed first-hand how community minded the Americans were and it inspired him to do something for his own hometown.

Philip did not have to look too far before he realised that homeless men in the Hunter region desperately needed someone to care. This led to the establishment in 2011 of Hunter Valley Men’s Crisis Support which provides assistance to homeless men in Maitland/Lower Hunter. This support group aims to give blokes a hand up when they are at their lowest point. They do this by providing practical, short-term assistance to men experiencing or at risk of homelessness or financial difficulty.

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Broken Lives Broken Minds

With special guest:

• Pamela Roche

The attitude of politicians towards International Parental Child Abduction seems to be “It ain’t broke and I ain’t gonna fix it.”; Our guest today is Pamela Roche who tells us how the system is broken and we need to get the word out to politicians, judges, lawyers and professional therapists.

When the father of her children breached English Family Court orders and refused to return them after a visit to the USA Pamela expected that she could rely on the legal system and the various institutions to restore order. She discovered that the USA is a signatory to the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Parental Child Abduction. This is a multilateral treaty developed by the Hague Conference on Private International Law that provides an expeditious method to return a child internationally abducted by a parent from one member country to another. Pamela naively believed that with the USA being a first world country and part of the Hague Convention this should have been straightforward once she established the facts and got local advice.

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Year of the Dad

With special guest:

• Nick Thorpe

A special program to celebrate National Families Week

Our guest today is Nick Thorpe who is used to taking on big challenges. One such challenge was to voyage to Easter Island on a raft of reeds. Now he is working on making Scotland the best place in the world for children to grow up and as part of that campaign he is promoting 2016 as the Year of the Dad. This is part of the campaign organised by the Fathers Network Scotland with support from the Scottish Government.

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Parents Acting Badly

With special guest:

• Dr Jennifer Harman

Why is it that we never see young animals rejecting a caring parent in the way we see some children acting? The behaviour of the other parent may be the cause and this strange behaviour may be due to Parental Alienation.

Our guest today is Associate Professor Jennifer Harman who tells us that the problem of Parental Alienation is all too common and getting worse around the world yet it is still decried by some as “junk science”.

Jennifer tells us that the scientific analysis of Parental Alienation is still at a beginning stage. The research is still focussing on the description of Parental Alienation because we have not yet reached the predictive stage. This is the normal scientific approach to research and can be compared with where we are up to with the topic du jour, domestic violence. However no-one denies the existence of domestic violence in the way they once did.

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Genital Autonomy

With special guest:

• Paul Mason

Worldwide Day of Genital Autonomy is May 7

We ask all the questions that others don’t dare! In today’s program we explore a topic that makes some people want to cross their legs and most people look the other way. And yet everyone has a definite opinion on it.

Our topic is the genital cutting of healthy boys and girls where it has been consented to by their parents. The practice is given a different name for boys, circumcision, whereas for girls in Australia it is usually called for what it is, namely genital mutilation.

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An Attachment-Based Model of Parental Alienation: Foundations

With special guest:

• Dr Craig Childress

Why is parental alienation such a controversial topic?

Nearly everyone knows someone who has had a child turned against them after separation of the parents. It happens unfortunately all over the world and looks remarkably similar wherever you find it. The construct was defined and given a label, “parental alienation” some thirty years ago by Dr Richard Gardner. More recently there has been a strong push to have it included as a separate diagnosis in the therapists’ “Bible” the DSM-5.

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Private Bill: In Love and War

With special guest:

• Barrie Cassidy

It makes for a rare occasion when Barrie Cassidy goes to the other side of the microphone. Barrie is one of Australia’s most respected and experienced political journalists and we welcome him to Dads on the Air.

But we are not going to discuss politics in this program. We are going to find out more about Barrie’s father Bill who is the main subject in Barrie’s book Private Bill: In Love and War.

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Testicular Cancer

With special guest:

• Mr Gideon Blecher

This is a topic that is not often raised in polite company or even on talkback radio.

Many men would be reluctant to discuss testicular cancer even with their doctor. This is despite about 700 men being diagnosed in Australia every year, and in men aged 18-39 it is the second most common form of cancer.

In this program we go to the Expert Reviewer for Andrology Australia Mr Gideon Blecher to find out what we should know. And there is some good news to pass on. Gideon refers to Lance Armstrong who developed this form of cancer before his later Tour de France exploits. We are told that Armstrong is a great example to show that even when the cancer has spread to other parts of the body modern treatment can lead to a full recovery.

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Being Dads

With special guest:

• David Willans

There are changes happening in Western societies that are hard to ignore. Our Dads are getting more involved in one-on-one relationships with their children and if that means reducing the time put into the provider role then that is the price for the modern family.

Our guest today David Willans speaks to us from London and he tells us what led to a decision he made in 2014 regarding a change in his family arrangements. David cannot now even remember what the issue was with his son but he clearly remembers yelling at his then 5 year old. We all know the feeling when you are under pressure and a child seems oblivious. It can be a bit like a kettle reaching boiling point.

On this day two years ago David saw that his young son was being attacked by an angry man that he didn’t recognise as himself. Rather than being the great Dad he had always aspired to be he had become a cross Dad and his 5 year old child did not know how to respond.

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The Fathering Project

With special guest:

• John Bond

Our guest today is the son of a very famous father, Alan Bond who is forever linked with Australia winning the America’s Cup in 1983. John Bond was there for this hugely significant event in the USA, one which lifted the whole country. Where to after that?

John Bond returned to Australia and got his motivation when he heard an address by Professor Bruce Robinson which inspired him to support the most powerful force for reducing the chances of our kids falling victim to drugs, suicide and crime. Having an effective father or even a father figure leads to reduced incidence of crime, alcohol and drug abuse; it enhances mental health and self-esteem, leads to improved school engagement and performance, social competence and improved health behaviours generally. Professor Robinson, who has previously been a guest on Dads on the Air provided the research which is compelling.

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SHTUM

With special guest:

• Jem Lester

In this program we cross to London to discuss with author Jem Lester his new novel SHTUM. For anyone who has missed the British television shows and is not sure what “shtum” means Jem tells us that it means “silent or uncommunicative”. That is what a loving father may face when he has a child with profound autism.

The book SHTUM won the 2013 PFD/City University Prize for Fiction but in writing the book Jem tells us he draws on his own experiences having raised a boy now nearly 16 who is profoundly autistic.

This is one of those books you do not want to put down. One of the characters refers to the power of words and yet the most eloquent communication between a father and a son is a non-verbal moment where the connection is “hilarious, fleeting and precious.”

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Didge Group Connection to Culture

With special guest:

• Stuart McMinn

Our National Close the Gap Day program

Stuart McMinn is working in a program that draws on tens of thousands of years of culture to benefit our youth, in particular our young Indigenous men.

Following on from the vision of local Indigenous man, Uncle Bob Williams from the Mingaletta Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islanders Corporation, Interrelate Central Coast supported the establishment of the Young Boys Didgeridoo and Cultural Group, ‘Didge’, in mid-2011. This new group offered cultural and other supports which had an immediate and significant impact.

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Leading Women for Shared Parenting

With special guest:

• Molly Olson

Why would leading women want to join a group that is striving to achieve the sharing of time that children spend with both parents after separation or divorce? If the approach of the Courts and the legislature has always been that the mothers are essential, fathers not so, why would these women work tirelessly to make changes?

Molly Olson is one of the fair-minded women found around the world who can see the benefits to the children as well as to the parents if the allocated time is shared. After listening to Molly it becomes a no-brainer that in her words the system has to change and it will change.

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Is There Anything Good About Men?

With special guest:

• Prof Roy F. Baumeister

Something we have always wanted to know but never been game to ask.

This book’s title Is There Anything Good About Men? How Cultures Flourish by Exploiting Men leads on to a whole range of surprises. We often accept without questioning that women are better networkers than men and that women are better at multi-tasking but is this supported in the research? At a practical level will women succeed in the current push for much more representation on the Boards of major companies?

Professor Roy Baumeister has examined human behaviour as our culture developed. This culture brings humans enormous advantages not available to other primates. You just have to think of us being able to shop at supermarkets, sleep in a warm bed every night and being able to find out on our computers everything ever learned in human history.

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BuildingBoys.net

With special guest:

• Jennifer Fink

Are our boys failing school or is school failing them?

This is a question for everyone because while kids haven’t changed much over the last 100 years there has been a fundamental change in the performance of boys and girls in their education.

In the USA, Australia and 70 other developed countries according to UN figures, boys now lag behind girls on every single academic measure, they get into trouble and they drop out of school more frequently than girls. There are fewer boys at University and there are far more lost 20-something boys than 20-something girls. For the first time in the history of the United States boys are less educated than their dads. So what is going wrong and what can we do about it?

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Protecting Emilie

With special guest:

• Lisa Heim

A check in the index of topics will reveal that we have explored parental alienation from different angles by talking to academics, psychologists and researchers. Today we cross to Florida in the USA to hear a very real account of what this type of psychological child abuse looks like to those who are personally caught up in it.

Lisa Heim is the author of Protecting Emilie and in this book she tells the story of what happens to people catapulted into this nightmare world of parental alienation, something that could happen to you, your neighbour or parents on the other side of the world. Lisa gives an account of her relationship with her husband, his daughter Emilie, in the title of the book, and her own daughter, as it was affected by the conflict instigated by Emilie’s mother.

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Stop Male Suicide

With special guest:

• Glen Poole

Every day in Australia five men die from suicide. While every single suicide is a tragedy, men account for 75% of all suicides in this country. How is it that while male suicide is increasing the numbers for women are improving? We need to investigate and see if this success can be replicated for men. Even a small improvement in the numbers has an enormous effect on the emotional cost and the financial cost to all of us.

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