Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with a Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Thursday, March 5, 2015 at 9:00AM 
With special guest:
- Bill Eddy
The word Splitting brings to mind a number of possibilities but in Bill Eddy’s book it is not the obvious meaning of breaking up with a partner. Here we are looking at “splitting” meaning a defence mechanism universally seen in people with Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders. It means unconsciously seeing people as all good or all bad and is especially prevalent when there is stress such as in a break-up with someone the person afflicted sees as critical to emotional survival.
We all know someone like this which is why Bill has often been asked if he knows the partner because he seems to know their behaviour so well. Studies in the US show that approximately 15% of people aged 20-29 meet the criteria for one or both of these disorders and the prevalence of the disorders appears to be increasing with each generation.
Based on his extensive experience as a therapist and a family lawyer and drawing on the experience of his co-author Randi Kreger, Bill gives us a fascinating walk through the topics contained in this book which is popular worldwide.
One of the problems that a spouse may have is that the person with these disorders may appear initially as convincing, even charming to lawyers and judges. Furthermore the legal system could have been designed to support them because the courts see matters in black and white, never grey. This suits the Borderline and Narcissistic personalities down to the ground and they often prosper in court with even outrageous demands.
Bill tells us how to protect yourself from manipulation, false accusation and abuse. He shows the way so that you can be assertive and thinking strategically rather than retreating in a state of shock.
Bill has a way of presenting the best psychological advice in a way that is accessible to all of us and there is no doubt that this is needed in today’s personal relationships particularly if a dispute reaches the Family Law courts of the Western world.
Bill Eddy
Bill Eddy is a lawyer, therapist, mediator and the President of High Conflict Institute. He developed the “High Conflict Personality” theory (HCP Theory) and is an international expert on managing disputes involving high conflict personalities and personality disorders. He provides training on this subject to lawyers, mediators, and business people in the USA, Canada, France and Sweden. Bill has also visited Australia on several occasions and will visit Melbourne later in the year to provide some training to our Judges. A wealth of information is contained on the High Conflict Institute blog site.
Song selections by our guest: You Can’t Always Get What You Want by The Rolling Stones & Fields of Gold by Sting