They’ll be Okay

With special guest:

• Collett Smart
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Collett Smart has written her book They’ll be Okay: 15 Conversations to Help Your Child Through Troubled Times for parents. Parents often see the world today as being in troubled times. There are new challenges. To name just a few, think of the availability of pornography, the internet generally, excessive use of game technology, bullying and the high levels of competition in every field of endeavour.

But our guest Collett has a message of hope and we get to hear about it firsthand. We are alerted to some of the hidden messages that are propagated, for example in advertising. This is where modelling on the good examples is important. We all know a good male role model but what is often shown on TV is a Dad who can only be described as a “dumb dad”. What should we do? We should call it out for what it is and give credit to the good dad.

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Beer + Bubs

With special guest:

• Carrina Hampton
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today is Carrina Hampton who has many qualifications that include being a qualified social worker, a family therapist, a clinical hypnotherapist and a doula.

All of this expertise is put to good use when Carrina takes her Beer + Bubs program to the pub in locations right across Australia. Beer + Bubs is a one-night session at the pub where expectant dads learn how to best support their partner up to and following the birth of their child. The combination of the location, the one or two glasses of amber fluid and being surrounded by other men in similar circumstances has proven to be a winner for the program.

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Mothering Our Boys

With special guest:

• Maggie Dent
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

It is ten years since we last spoke to Maggie Dent and in that time the pressure on our boys has only got worse.

Now more than ever we need a consistent voice, a sensible voice backed by extensive research, in fact a boy champion. Fortunately this is recognised in the huge reaction given to Maggie’s new book Mothering Our Boys: A guide for mums of sons and in public forums that Maggie delivers around the nation. It is a privilege for us to be able to share Maggie’s thoughts in this special program.

Here is a question Maggie asked some 1600 men in a survey. What would you say is one of the best things your mum has done for you/that has influenced you? There was a second question, in your life what is the one thing you wish your mum hadn’t done? Why not ask yourself those questions, it may be the first time you have thought about it. Maggie takes us into the responses she received and tells us what it means.

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Dads Group Inc

With special guest:

• Tom Docking
  … in conversation with Glen Poole

Most Dads can remember vividly the time they were told that they were going to be a father for the first time. There may be a sense of starting on a journey, that life as it has been up until that point has changed forever or even that this is a type of eternity because part of you goes on long after your passing.

Our guest today, Tom Docking from Dad’s Group Inc, was overwhelmed by a different feeling. He felt he could not cope with this new responsibility and had to spend some time alone. When he realised that he needed some support there was an unpleasant discovery, no help was available.

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Dads and their Babies

With special guest:

• Dr Dawson Cooke
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

We will all readily make the assumption that the bond between mothers and their babies is important for the health of the family but what about the dad-baby bond? Our guest today is Dr Dawson Cooke who is able to discuss that relationship based on the findings in his study recently published in Infant Mental Health. Dr Cooke has been working with parents and particularly fathers for the last 15 years both in his practice and as a researcher at Curtin University in WA. In his latest study which involved 451 families he has made some findings that have caught the attention of the media.

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The Children’s House

With special guest:

• Alice Nelson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Alice Nelson has produced a topical work with enough discussion points to keep us busy for a long time in her new book The Children’s House.

The title of the book comes from a kibbutz in Israel. The kibbutz movement arose in Israel after the horrors of Nazi Germany, partly as a way of allowing parents to work for the new state of Israel while ensuring that their children would be properly cared for. But does the idea of communal parenting go too far? This is just one of the ethical questions raised in The Children’s House.

From Israel we travel to Rwanda and finally to the world’s melting pot in New York. It is there that we discover the different forces prevalent in modern families with all their mysteries and complexities. In speaking to Alice about her characters we get even more depth into the non-traditional relationships revealed in her book. There are some real surprises in store for the reader.

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SMS4dads

With special guest: 

• Dr Chris May

Who ya gonna call? 

Our guest today is Dr Chris May from the University of Newcastle and he has a simple message for new Dads with mobile phones. Sign up for SMS4 dads and you will get the advice you need to deal with the new challenges we face as a Dad. This is not limited to young Dads. The age range of Dads already accessing the service extends to the over 50 year olds. 

A really good aspect of this service is that it is available to Dads in remote locations that find it particularly hard to access help. The NBN is opening up the most remote areas to better communication and this will make access easy. 

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Fathers Reaching Out

With special guest:

• Mark Williams

Our guest in today’s program is Mark Williams who has been awarded “Inspirational Father of the Year” at the Pride of Britain awards. This is impressive enough but it also shows how far he has come since the birth of his son Ethan in 2004.

Both Mark and his wife Michelle suffered crippling anxiety after the birth and Mark hit rock bottom when he began to experience suicidal thoughts. And yet the reason for the torrent of negative emotions and spiralling depression had less to do with their son than the mental health issues that were confronting them. In hindsight Mark recognises that he had experienced a condition long recognised in mothers, that of post-natal depression.

The problem at the time was that Mark felt he could not speak to anyone about his stressful condition and ultimately it led to a breakdown. There is still a stigma attached to men admitting that they have post-natal depression and this makes them reluctant to seek help or even talk to their friends and loved ones about it.

Eventually Mark was put on medication and took a course of cognitive behavioural therapy and mindfulness which turned things around. Now Mark and Michelle are closer than ever as a couple and have a fantastic bond with their son. Mark wants to get the message out about the condition and the help available.

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Reflective Parenting

With special guest:

• Dr Alistair Cooper
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

“She has a mind of her own” is something we hear often enough when parents are talking about the challenges they face in trying to relate with their children. Yet if parents accepted this as fact and tried to find out what was going on inside this other mind the world would become a lot less complicated for both parent and child. With co-author Dr Sheila Redfern our guest today Dr Alistair Cooper has written a new book Reflective Parenting: A Guide to Understanding What’s Going on in Your Child’s Mind showing how to read your child’s mind and use this knowledge to improve your relationship. If you follow the principles of reflective parenting in everyday interactions it will help your child achieve her full potential and save your sanity.

The book is filled with practical advice and real life situations based on Ali’s extensive clinical experience and in some cases drawing on his experience with his own children to show us the possibilities.

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Leading Women for Shared Parenting

With special guest:

• Molly Olson

Why would leading women want to join a group that is striving to achieve the sharing of time that children spend with both parents after separation or divorce? If the approach of the Courts and the legislature has always been that the mothers are essential, fathers not so, why would these women work tirelessly to make changes?

Molly Olson is one of the fair-minded women found around the world who can see the benefits to the children as well as to the parents if the allocated time is shared. After listening to Molly it becomes a no-brainer that in her words the system has to change and it will change.

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Dadvice

With special guest:

• Dr Luke Martin

Seriously! Becoming a Dad can be a white-knuckle ride and sometimes it can be overwhelming. When you leave the hospital carrying a new baby it might be the first time it hits you that you have taken on an enormous responsibility and yet you are not issued with an instruction booklet.

Men have lots of different reactions when they hear that they are about to be joined by a new family member who will need 24-hour support. Some jump around, some think about the meaning of life and some might even feel depressed. The main thing to remember is that whatever feelings you experience you will not be the first. This is where Dadvice comes in, a new mental health campaign for new Dads developed by beyondblue and funded by the Movember Foundation.

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Dads and their Babies

With special guest:

• Dr Dawson Cooke

We will all readily make the assumption that the bond between mothers and their babies is important for the health of the family but what about the dad-baby bond? Our guest today is Dr Dawson Cooke who is able to discuss that relationship based on the findings in his study recently published in Infant Mental Health. Dr Cooke has been working with parents and particularly fathers for the last 15 years both in his practice and as a researcher at Curtin University in WA. In his latest study which involved 451 families he has made some findings that have caught the attention of the media.

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#DADUP

With special guest:

• Nick Thorpe

Scotland has become a hotbed of reform in supporting dads.

After the highly successful Year of the Dad campaign in 2016 Fathers Network Scotland has again joined with the Scottish Government in the 2017 campaign called Dad Up. In today’s program we cross to Edinburgh to speak to Nick Thorpe who is the Head of Communications for Fathers Network Scotland to hear directly about the successes and what has been learned through these initiatives.

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Families are like Fingerprints: They are all Different

With special guest:

• Clint Greagen

It is time to check in again with our favourite Stay-at- Home Dad namely Clint Greagen, the Reservoir Dad.

We last spoke to Clint after the release of his book Reservoir Dad which described his experiences after he quit his job while his wife Tania returned to the workforce. This decision meant that Clint became the parent of first resource, the glue in the family and exchanged a career outside the home for all the benefits that come from a close relationship with one’s own children. Clint and Tania now have four children ranging from age 5 through to age 12.

Clint can speak with authority about the recent study conducted by the Australian Institute of Family Studies on stay-at-home parents. Clint is especially motivated to speak up because of the treatment given to the results of the study by the media. Headlines such as “Do stay-at-home Dads have to lift their game?” are misleading about the study findings and what is really going on.

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Beer + Bubs

With special guest:

• Carrina Bradbury

Our guest today is Carrina Bradbury who has many qualifications that include being a qualified social worker, a family therapist, a clinical hypnotherapist and a doula.

All of this expertise is put to good use when Carrina takes her Beer + Bubs program to the pub in locations right across Australia. Beer + Bubs is a one-night session at the pub where expectant dads learn how to best support their partner up to and following the birth of their child. The combination of the location, the one or two glasses of amber fluid and being surrounded by other men in similar circumstances has proven to be a winner for the program.

Listen Now (mp3)

Click to read more ...

SMS4dads

With special guest:

• Dr Chris May

Who ya gonna call?

Our guest today is Dr Chris May from the University of Newcastle and he has a simple message for new Dads with mobile phones. Sign up for SMS4 dads and you will get the advice you need to deal with the new challenges we face as a Dad. This is not limited to young Dads. The age range of Dads already accessing the service extends to the over 50 year olds.

A really good aspect of this service is that it is available to Dads in remote locations that find it particularly hard to access help. The NBN is opening up the most remote areas to better communication and this will make access easy.

Listen Now (mp3)

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Flesh Wounds

With special guest:

• Richard Glover

Our guest today is famous.

Richard Glover is the host of the top rating Drive show on 702 ABC Sydney, and the weekly podcast of Thank God It’s Friday. He is the author of twelve books including the bestseller In Bed with Jocasta. His new book Flesh Wounds is in a similar humorous vein but the big difference this time is that it is the real story of his unusual, to say the least, upbringing.

We got Richard on the other side of the microphone from his usual radio role to explore with us his journey from being one of the first artificially inseminated babies in Australia. This was followed by a childhood in Papua-New Guinea and then on to maintaining a relationship with a mother who lived in a fantasy world and a father who let the real world get on top of him.

The book is described by one reviewer as “sad, funny, revealing, optimistic and hopeful”. This is a clear indication that we can all relate to at least some of Richard’s story, perhaps to our surprise.

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Ugly: A beaut story about one very ugly kid

With special guest:

• Robert Hoge

Robert Hoge has a daughter Imogen who sums it up best. She said about Robert’s book Ugly “It’s important to tell your story especially when you’re different”

As one of the many roles that our guest today has filled with distinction he is an advocate for those with a disability and today we hear what it is like to grow up in a special club.

When Robert was 4 years old his parents decided on his behalf that because of his birth condition the best way forward was amputation on his legs and major operations on his face. While the operations were medical firsts and very successful they still left the young child with prosthetic legs and an unusual face that would draw sometimes unwanted attention. We hear from Robert today how he drew strength from his loving family and how his father responded when his youngest child needed support.

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Fathers Reaching Out

With special guest:

• Mark Williams

Our guest in today’s program is Mark Williams who has been awarded “Inspirational Father of the Year” at the Pride of Britain awards. This is impressive enough but it also shows how far he has come since the birth of his son Ethan in 2004.

Both Mark and his wife Michelle suffered crippling anxiety after the birth and Mark hit rock bottom when he began to experience suicidal thoughts. And yet the reason for the torrent of negative emotions and spiralling depression had less to do with their son than the mental health issues that were confronting them. In hindsight Mark recognises that he had experienced a condition long recognised in mothers, that of post-natal depression.

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The Parental Alienation Syndrome

With special guest:

• Linda Gottlieb Kase

In today’s program we go to New York to find out the latest on the way Parental Alienation is treated by the Courts and by therapists internationally. While Parental Alienation Syndrome (or PAS) still appears to be a controversial topic in Australia there is no difficulty in recognising this evil for what it is in the USA.

In Linda Gottlieb Kase’s book she describes 56 alienated children and 32 alienated parents from her experience in practice. In these studies there are more mothers being the alienators with fathers being the target but this is put down to the syndrome being opportunistic rather than any particular propensity of either sex. In the USA as in Australia the mothers get a greater share of time with the children awarded by the Courts and accordingly their opportunity to alienate the children is also greater. Interestingly Linda Gottlieb Kase says that if fathers were awarded more time with their children it is likely that they would be more likely to be the alienators.

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