Being Black ’n Chicken, & Chips

With special guest:

• Matt Okine
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Matt Okine’s book Being Black ‘n Chicken, & Chips is based on his award-winning stand-up show and is at once heart-breaking and hilarious.

Matt provides a bird’s eye view of life as a 12 year old when things start unravelling, just as that boy/child is working out some important stuff. He is working on There is the relationship with his father that has never really developed; there is a potential heart stopping girlfriend on the fringes; and there is a girl next door who is more of a friend than his male companions. Finally and most importantly he has to negotiate the changing relationship with his mother.

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Deadly Connections

With special guest:

• Keenan Mundine
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Dreamer, nothing but a dreamer. That might be where it started for our guest today Keenan Mundine after a beginning in life that really didn’t give him a chance.

But after Keenan had spent the first half of his life in the criminal justice system he came to a realisation. Keenan either had to change his ways or face up to spending his life behind bars. Fortunately for us and for Keenan he decided to make a worthwhile contribution to society. And so was born Deadly Connections where he is the co-founder along with his wife Carly.

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Five Years From Now

With special guest:

• Paige Toon
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In today’s episode we speak to author and citizen of the world Paige Toon who has written a novel exploring the relationship between two children from opposite ends of the world and their fathers.

We drop in on these lives every five years to see how things have changed and we find there are plenty of surprises as we trace the emotional development of the main characters.

The fathers in the story start from different points. One is close to his daughter and always has been. The other did not get to meet his son until he was seven. Yet both children see the importance of that father/child relationship as they make their way through life. The book is all about relationships and how timing can be all important.

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High Adventure

With special guest:

• Mike Allsop
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Mike Allsop was worried that marriage would spell the end of the adventurous life he had been living. He also had experienced a difficult family upbringing himself. So when he met the love of his life he certainly did not rush into that long walk down the aisle. But these days he has the “full disaster” with his wife Wendy and three beautiful children. And there are lessons to be learned from Mike’s progress that we can all appreciate.

Talking to Mike makes you feel like you were there with him when he reached the summit of Mt Everest with nobody in front of him. We learn about the setbacks when he was getting ready to run 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents starting with his belief that he wasn’t really a marathon runner.

This love of setting and reaching goals started when he was a child and he saw an Air New Zealand jet passing overhead. He had the goal of becoming a pilot and finished up getting his pilot’s licence before he had his motor vehicle licence. By gaining the confidence of some airline pilots he went on to achieve his dream.

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Foreskin Revolution

With special guest:

• Michael Winnel
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Most people are surprised when this topic is raised. Is circumcision still being practised in Australia outside strict religious groups?

The answer is unfortunately yes. And Medicare will still pay benefits for the procedure unlike for example Great Britain where the National Health stopped subsidising male circumcision in the 1940’s.

The percentage of young boys who suffer this mutilation in Australia is down to about 10% but that still adds up to a lot of boys going under a knife with no anaesthetic for dubious reasons.

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Sam’s Best Shot

With special guest:

• Dr James Best

How many Dads will walk away from their jobs for six months, sell their home and then travel to the wilds of Africa in the hope that it will be good for their son?

We like to think most Dads would do it. Today we get to speak to Dr James Best who did exactly that with his 14 year old son Sam. Sam said he went away as a boy and came back as a person summing up what his parents had hoped for when they embarked on this adventure.

Sam has special needs because he has been diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum. Sam is around about the middle of the spectrum not at the extreme ends of either those who cannot talk or the savants. Sam can read and write; he is good at maths and music. He comes out with quirky interpretations of what others see and is often described as a charmer. Sam’s greatest difficulty is with social communication, maintaining eye contact and focussing on a task. He is prone to outbursts, even violent outbursts when frustrated.

Behind the thinking of James was that they had tried all the conventional approaches to dealing with autism and yet they still worried whether Sam would be able to form relationships, get a job and to all the other things we regard as normal in Western society. So having done a lot of scientific research on their own and with the support of the experts in the field Sam and his wife Benison decided to take on something different.

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They’ll be Okay

With special guest:

• Collett Smart
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Collett Smart has written her book They’ll be Okay: 15 Conversations to Help Your Child Through Troubled Times for parents. Parents often see the world today as being in troubled times. There are new challenges. To name just a few, think of the availability of pornography, the internet generally, excessive use of game technology, bullying and the high levels of competition in every field of endeavour.

But our guest Collett has a message of hope and we get to hear about it firsthand. We are alerted to some of the hidden messages that are propagated, for example in advertising. This is where modelling on the good examples is important. We all know a good male role model but what is often shown on TV is a Dad who can only be described as a “dumb dad”. What should we do? We should call it out for what it is and give credit to the good dad.

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Mothering Our Boys

With special guest:

• Maggie Dent
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

It is ten years since we last spoke to Maggie Dent and in that time the pressure on our boys has only got worse.

Now more than ever we need a consistent voice, a sensible voice backed by extensive research, in fact a boy champion. Fortunately this is recognised in the huge reaction given to Maggie’s new book Mothering Our Boys: A guide for mums of sons and in public forums that Maggie delivers around the nation. It is a privilege for us to be able to share Maggie’s thoughts in this special program.

Here is a question Maggie asked some 1600 men in a survey. What would you say is one of the best things your mum has done for you/that has influenced you? There was a second question, in your life what is the one thing you wish your mum hadn’t done? Why not ask yourself those questions, it may be the first time you have thought about it. Maggie takes us into the responses she received and tells us what it means.

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The Children’s House

With special guest:

• Alice Nelson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Alice Nelson has produced a topical work with enough discussion points to keep us busy for a long time in her new book The Children’s House.

The title of the book comes from a kibbutz in Israel. The kibbutz movement arose in Israel after the horrors of Nazi Germany, partly as a way of allowing parents to work for the new state of Israel while ensuring that their children would be properly cared for. But does the idea of communal parenting go too far? This is just one of the ethical questions raised in The Children’s House.

From Israel we travel to Rwanda and finally to the world’s melting pot in New York. It is there that we discover the different forces prevalent in modern families with all their mysteries and complexities. In speaking to Alice about her characters we get even more depth into the non-traditional relationships revealed in her book. There are some real surprises in store for the reader.

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Surviving Adolescents

With special guest:

• Elly Robinson
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

All parents realise on leaving the maternity ward that there is no manual that comes from the hospital with instructions for a new baby. The parents just strap themselves in for the rapid growth and development of this new and totally dependent child.

Ten years later with the coming of adolescence there is another period of risky growth and development. The age group from 10 to 19 calls upon a whole new skill set to deal with challenges some of which are familiar and some that are new to this century.

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Five Years From Now

With special guest:

• Paige Toon
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

In today’s episode we speak to author and citizen of the world Paige Toon who has written a novel exploring the relationship between two children from opposite ends of the world and their fathers.

We drop in on these lives every five years to see how things have changed and we find there are plenty of surprises as we trace the emotional development of the main characters.

The fathers in the story start from different points. One is close to his daughter and always has been. The other did not get to meet his son until he was seven. Yet both children see the importance of that father/child relationship as they make their way through life. The book is all about relationships and how timing can be all important.

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The Shepherd’s Hut

With special guest:

• Tim Winton
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

For our regulars this week’s interview is a bit different. Due to technical problems we do not have a sound file of the interview with Tim Winton. However set out below is a transcript which we hope you will find interesting. In the interview we talk about Tim’s latest book The Shepherd’s Hut and also explore some of the issues raised in the book in a wider context. In particular we are interested in Tim’s thoughts about his characters, where they come from in his mind and the relationships between them.

Tim has often explored the relationships that boys form. In this book Tim’s feral young male comes to an uneasy and difficult peace with an old man living in the wilderness as a hermit. The relationship is set against the timeless and beautiful West Australian remoteness described in Tim’s usual colourful language even as his characters speak in a less literate way.

The attached sound file is an excerpt from a speech Tim presented in Melbourne earlier this year kindly made available to us by Tim’s publishers Penguin Random House.

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Men of Honour

With special guest:

• Glen Gerreyn
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Our guest today is Glen Gerreyn a man by choice as distinct from being born male. This personal development did not happen when he became a champion athlete but rather by some important choices that Glen has made in his life. So what does it mean to be a man, a real man? And what are these choices?

Glen has spoken to groups around Australia and around the world on the topic of men of honour and some of the content probably comes under the heading of “secret men’s business”. In these talks no subject is taboo. Because so many fatherless boys in our community do not have a mentor they can confide in, Glen often finds that no-one else has ever spoken to our young men so frankly in language they understand.

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Working Class Boy

With special guest:

• Jimmy Barnes

Normally we expect to listen to Jimmy Barnes’s creative output as the lead singer and one of the main songwriters for iconic Australian rock band Cold Chisel. But Jimmy has now produced Working Class Boy which has become an Australian bestselling book.

This is not the story of that well-known band or his more recent exploration of the soul music catalogue. In today’s program we hear about Jimmy’s family upbringing and the influence that had on him in his adopted country.

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Youth Express

With special guest:

• James Winter
  … in conversation with Bill Kable

Making a living in the Australian theatre has never been an easy task. Our guest today is James Winter an actor and director who has raised the level of difficulty significantly.

James draws on his over 20 years’ experience in the arts industry to create performance with non-performers, particularly the marginalised and at risk youthful members of our community. In doing this work through the Belvoir St Theatre’s Outreach Program, Youth Express, James engages with young people who may be homeless and find themselves excluded from mainstream education.

Youth with these challenges come from a number of support organisations including Key College, an accredited High School in Redfern Sydney run by Father Chris Riley’s Youth Off The Streets. Belvoir’s Youth Express provides them with access to a professional theatre company and its artists.

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Our Boys: Raising strong, happy sons from boyhood to manhood

With special guests:

• Richard Aston & Ruth Kerr

On this program we get to talk to good people who are making a difference in our society. Our guests today, Richard Aston and his wife Ruth Kerr, fit this category and they speak to us from across the ditch in New Zealand.

For fifeen years Richard and Ruth through the Big Buddy program have been providing fatherless boys with a buddy, someone who can show them the way to manhood. These buddies are volunteer mentors who are carefully chosen by going through a detailed screening. The boys know they can rely on their buddies to turn up when expected and listen to what is happening in the boys’ lives. And they get to do fun things.

Having seen up close and personal what makes boys tick Richard and Ruth have distilled for us what works and what does not work when the aim is to develop our boys into adults. This is practical and down to earth advice set out in their new book Our Boys: Raising strong, happy sons from boyhood to manhood.

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Fight Like A Pro

With special guest:

• Gavin Topp

Today’s show is a knockout! Our guest is Gavin Topp and he tells us about his training program called Fight Like a Pro which he runs on the Gold Coast of Queensland.

It is not an overstatement to say that the program has changed lives because on top of the physical aspects of training hard with a group of fellow amateurs Gavin looks for the mental changes in his charges. You might not expect to hear life lessons from a professional boxer but as numerous testimonials on the website of Fight Like a Pro will confirm Gavin is a bit of a philosopher as well as a hard physical taskmaster.

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Didge Group Connection to Culture

With special guest:

• Stuart McMinn

Stuart McMinn is working in a program that draws on tens of thousands of years of culture to benefit our youth, in particular our young Indigenous men.

Following on from the vision of local Indigenous man, Uncle Bob Williams from the Mingaletta Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islanders Corporation, Interrelate Central Coast supported the establishment of the Young Boys Didgeridoo and Cultural Group, ‘Didge’, in mid-2011. This new group offered cultural and other supports which had an immediate and significant impact.

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Sam’s Best Shot

With special guest:

• Dr James Best

How many Dads will walk away from their jobs for six months, sell their home and then travel to the wilds of Africa in the hope that it will be good for their son?

We like to think most Dads would do it. Today we get to speak to Dr James Best who did exactly that with his 14 year old son Sam. Sam said he went away as a boy and came back as a person summing up what his parents had hoped for when they embarked on this adventure.

Sam has special needs because he has been diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum. Sam is around about the middle of the spectrum not at the extreme end of either those who cannot talk or the savants. Sam can read and write, he is good at maths and music. He comes out with quirky interpretations of what others see and is often described as a charmer. Sam’s greatest difficulty is with social communication, maintaining eye contact and focussing on a task. He is prone to outbursts, even violent outbursts when frustrated.

Behind the thinking of James was that they had tried all the conventional approaches to dealing with autism and yet they still worried whether Sam would be able to form relationships, get a job and to all the other things we regard as normal in Western society. So having done a lot of scientific research on their own and with the support of the experts in the field Sam and his wife Benison decided to take on something different.

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Fathering Adventures

With special guest:

• Darren Lewis

He doesn’t claim to have been the beginning of all fathering adventures but in July 2008 Darren Lewis started an organisation by that name which has made many fathers and their children come alive through adventure based activities. Darren quotes Howard Thurman in recognising that the world needs people who have come alive.

We live in a world where fathers commonly spend just 8 minutes a day with each of their children, sometimes it is as little as 57 seconds on a week day. Darren provides an opportunity for Dads to spend dedicated time with their children in a fun environment.

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